The Ethics & Philosophy Of Clocks In Bathrooms

So we moved like 6 months ago and I’m still doing a bunch of new house shit. It’s taking far longer than expected. I’m getting around to wall decor. It’s still a juggling act with where exactly what’s gonna be, but I figure let’s hang some clocks. Gotta know the time, right? Right. So I figure, let’s start with five clocks and go from there. I hung up the first three in the three rooms we actually use. I hung up the fourth in a hallway. Why not. Then it struck me – why not in the bathroom? I suddenly remembered that growing up, we always had clocks hanging in the bathrooms. We had clocks in every room always. Is this a Slavic thing?

Hanging a clock in a bathroom… Who needs to know the time while taking a shit? Who shits without their phone? I encourage it. I have reading material at every bathroom is how much I encourage it. I’ve finished five silly books cover-to-cover just on the toilet alone this year. But I never needed to know the time. Clocks are pretty too. Or they can be. Maybe just functional art? Is any time still sacred? Or do the segments making up our lives fully belong to the hive?

What does it say about our fine society when we are so concerned with our next phonebook appointment or airplane ride, or even grocery shop, that we must pinch our poops mid-plop and run from the toilet with our trousers still around our ankles, toilet paper stuffed in our front pockets for later, running to catch the next train, bus, or automobile. Or what doesn’t it say…


Would you ever hang a clock in a bathroom?

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